Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Natawa ako


Akala ko mga pulis lang sa Pinas ang may mga jokes, pati din pala dito. This is really funny. Well at least if you read the headlines in NZ.


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How do you tell the difference between a New Zealand police officer, an Australian police officer and an American police officer?

Answer:-
First pose the following question:
"You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock ..40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?"

NZ POLICE OFFICER'S answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it, am I using it in an OSH approved fashion?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound
me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 1- 1- 1, would they just send me a taxi?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour.
If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away, Do I get blamed when he falls over running away, knocks his head and kills himself?
Will the NZ taxpayer foot the bill for his ACC claim if I injure him?
If I shoot him, and lose the court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and I will lose my family home?
Am I being culturally sensitive to the attacker if I shoot him, will I be offending his mana if I wound or kill him?
Will I have to defend myself in court as a racist if I shoot him?

AUSTRALIAN POLICE OFFICER'S answer: BANG!

AMERICAN OFFICER'S answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click....(sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click.


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

hahahahahaha....magandang joke yan ha. kaya lang bitin ako... eh pag pinoy na pulis, pano naman kaya?

sinag

Anonymous said...

ahahaha, marekoy huling-huli ang style ng mga police dito

jinkee said...

@ ray,

Pag pinoy na pulis, ganito "Pre, magkabaro naman tayo, ibalato mo na sa akin 'to."


@ madbong,

Di masyadong mababait ang mga pulis dito. Dapat dalhin na pinas para mag-train.